Scenes from Mardi Gras

March 7, 2011

Well the festival of gay that is Sydney’s Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras has finally ground to a halt for 2011.

Being a lazy lesbian all I managed to do was watch the parade, which being  a short lazy lesbian meant I didn’t actually see all that much.

Here’s what I did see…

Mardi Gras 2011

Train carriage over whelmed by an ACTUAL screaming queen with his gaggle of fag hags. He was so loud and exited I thought my ears were going to bleed

Mardi gras 2011, Dykes on Bikes

First cab off the rank as usual... Dykes on Bikes

Mardi Gras 2011

Mardi Gras virgin gets caught up in the excitement

Mardi Gras 2011

I think this float had some community legends on board. It's also one of the few pictures of the parade that worked

Mardi Gras 2011

Ladies dressed up for a big night out

Mardi Gras 2011

Took us a while to figure out what this was ... a big pink heart with wings and ping pong balls blowing around on the inside

Mardi Gras 2011

Lady in white giving the crowd some attitude

Mardi Gras 2011

Mardi Gras virgin looking for someone to burst her bubble

Mardi Gras 2011

Ladies in leather perusing the crowd

Mardi Gras 2011

Milperra Waters maitre de in rain poncho with electric gizmo

I had no idea what this float was when I photographed it at the parade

Celebrity TV couple watch the parade with the hoi poloi

Mardi Gras 2011

Lenny happily celebrating his community

Mardi Gras 2011

Very beautiful young man models his Keith Richards T

Mardi Gras 2011

How beautiful? Very beautiful!

Mardi Gras 2011

Wouldn't want to get on the wrong end of this oddly shaped football

Mardi Gras 2011

Post-parade plastic crate sculpture

Mardi Gras 2011

Very happily just married couple run hand-in-hand up Oxford St

Mardi Gras 2011

Minnie Mouse and friends post-parade bus stop rest-up

Mardi Gras 2011

Hostess girls fuel up on pastizzis post parade

Mardi Gras 2011

Oxford Street milk crate still life

Mardi Gras 2011

Friends all frocked up wandering down South Dowling Street


I kissed an Elvis (or four)

January 9, 2011

I kissed an Elvis and I liked it. In fact I liked it so much I went and kissed a few more.

Why did I kiss Elvii (the plural of Elvis)? Because I went to Parkes for the 2011 Elvis Festival and saw Dean Vegas, performing…

Dean Vegas steaming up the ladies at the 2011 Parks Elvis Festival

Dean Vegas on stage steaming up the ladies

You don’t believe Dean Vegas was making the ladies pants dance? See the evidence here…

The girls wetting themselves over Dean Vegas

The girls wetting themselves over Dean Vegas ... note the redhead on the right having a MOMENT

And I too was a little overcome and rushed the stage demanding a kiss.  He hesitated weirdly but let me peck him on the cheek which, FYI, was salty. I suspect he hesitated because the entire weekend I looked like this…

Year of Denim does Elvis drag

Me dressed and coiffured in an ode to the King in Jailhouse Rock

I’m not accusing Mr Dean Vegas of being homophobic. However I suspect he thought he was kissing a man as he peered down through the lights at me with my stuck-on sideburns.

After getting my rocks off kissing Dean Vegas I made a dedicated attempt on Saturday night to kiss some more Elvii…


The second Elvis I kissed, known as the Bearded Elvis and also the Bondi bus driver Elvis. He is very ugly and hilarious

Elvis Festival 2011

The third Elvis I kissed ... 'Black Elvis' (his suit, not his skin)

Elvis Festival Parkes

The fourth Elvis I kissed ... 'Big Nose Elvis', also known as Undercover Elvis (I think he's in the LAW enforcement business)

Big Nose Elvis liked my kiss so much he went back for seconds. I much preferred kissing one of his female entourage


I loved the Elvis Festival SO FREEEKIN’MUCH!!!  I’ll do a full breakdown right here in the next few days, but for now enjoy me and Mr PN doing Elvis on the hill above Parkes’ notorious Tent City.

What happened when a tall Elvis and a short Lady Elvis walked into a bar?

Post Denim Party picture fest

May 2, 2010


Thanks for coming to my end of the Year of Denim Party. You all looked amazing, filling my house to over flowing with denim.

I got up this morning (shattered) to find every surface smeared with either bright blue icing or blue curacao. Everything sticky, and food EVERYWHERE! So much food! Too much food. Cakes all over the place everywhere, denim climbing the walls, bottles strewn around the place (inside and out) and me feeling not right. At all.

But what a night! I had a great time all because of YOU!

Special thanks to Schappylle Scragg for bringing her beautiful self all the way from Smellbourne (her word not mine).

Don’t think I am capable of writing much more today. On to the party picture fest…

Year of Denim cakes, after the party

This is what the cakes looked like today

Once again, I thank you all for your hard work eating and drinking etc last night. And FYI FiGi is a party ANIMAL!!!!

Day 367: Friday 30 April 2010

April 30, 2010

The Official End of The Year of Denim

Special Edition…

Vale, Year of Denim:
as a gesture of farewell, we pay tribute to the pin-ups that lurk beneath Jane’s 367 everyday triple denim combinations.

Inspired by Helmut Newton’s androgynous fashion shoots, James Dean’s tough beauty, blaxploitation heroines like Pam Grier, and gender-bending burlesque, we have granted Jane licence to explore her glamorous alter-ego and tap into the popular cultural fantasies that drive much of her work as an artist.

These personae are not randomly chosen: they underline Jane’s interest in the borderlines between good and bad taste, queer and straight, masculinity and femininity, sexual allure and abjection. They also of course betray the fun of playing dress-ups, a playfulness that Jane shares with us as her friends, collaborators and audience.

It is a combination of courage — a dispassionate view of herself untainted by vanity; creativity — an ability to make raucous and astute references with the scantest of materials; and generosity — a desire to include others in her creative pursuits and explorations of self, that makes Jane so unique.

We congratulate her on having pursued, and now completed, the Year of Denim true to this spirit.

Cleopatra Jones: Year of Denim 2010

Cleopatra Jones - "The way I feel tonight, Muhammad Ali will have his hands full!"

Shaving: Year of Denim 2010

Doodlebug - "Hair's like a woman. You treat it good and it treats you good. Ain't that right honey? You hear what I'm saying? Yeah, you got to hold it, caress it, and love it. And if your hair gets out of line you take a scissor and say, "Hair I'm going to cut you.""

Helmut Newton homage: Year of Denim

Helmut Newton - "A woman does not live in front of white paper. She lives on the street, in a motor car, in a hotel room."

James Dean homage: Year of Denim

James Dean - "The gratification comes in the doing, not in the results."

Hair, make-up, camera, pinot noir: Beaver Dior
Concept, archival research, camera: HRH
Camera, prosecco, text: Jack
Everything else: Jambo

Over and Out

Thanks to all you readers, supporters, loaners and donaters of denim, commenators, rat bags, spammers, back stabbers, bitches and babes for an interesting Year of Denim. You know who you all are and I hope you all come along tomorrow night to celebrate the End of The Year of Denim.

Oh and today, as I gad about preparing for tomorrow night’s End of Denim function (if you’re reading this you’re invited) I am wearing this…

This image captures the Year of Denim perfectly. It's got it all: Tubes the denim snack, Taxi the dog, one of my fav denim itesm, the South Sea Bubbles bomber jacket, jeggings gifted exctly a year ago by AK, denim gym boots, studded denim cap donated by VOAK and a birthday cake from HRH

Top: South Sea Bubbles denim bomber jacket. I am so happy the weather turned so I got a chance to wear this on YoD one more time. Ta to the very generous donater of more than just the jacket, SLEE.

Bottom 1: Jeggings given to me on my birthday in 2009 at the very start of the Year of Denim

Bottom 2: JeasnWest denim skirt, bought in QLD for a song

Accessory 1: Denim gym boots gotten me through the hard times

Accessory 2: Denim bag with red piping slung over my shoulder

Accessory 3: Black denim, cap gifted

Accessory 4: Tubes, the self anointed denim snack

And don’t forget tomorrow night’s celebration of denim…

Day 365: Wednesday 28 April

April 28, 2010

The End of the Year of Denim celebrations are being readied right this minute. The big questions is exactly WHICH blue cocktail should be served at the function?

When I think blue cocktail Blue Lagoon is the first, in fact, the ONLY cocktail that springs to mind. So I thought a little research was necessary and I reached for my trusty cocktail book…

Year of Denim presents.... Cocktails for Two

And you know what? There’s more than one blue flavoured and coloured cocktails…

Blue lagoonVarious blue cocktailsBlue HawaiianBlue Margarita

And last but not least, especially as it has an awesome accompanying image….

Blue Star

Although I am quite partial to this particular cocktail, even though it’s not blue it just sounds, I dunno, nice and something I might enjoy…

Cocktail: Bosom Caresser

So which cocktail should I serve to mark the end of the Year of Denim and to stain my guests’ tongues? I’ll be out tonight ‘test driving’ a few myself. Vote in my poll for what YOU want to drink…

In the meantime I today I am rocking the rock’n’roll tracksuit ala the Canadian Tuxedo, a look so ghastly not even irony will help it. I used a fancy handbag to trick it up, but I don’t think it works. And honestly I don’t know whether I can remain in this combo. I’ll walk the dog and decide…

Is that a bum on your head or are you just an arse?

Top: Classic and genuine Levi’s jacket blending almost seamlessly into…

Bottom: Ben Sherman straight leg jeans, sloppy

Accessory: Chanel (fake??) handbag, not helping this look at all

Nup. That outfit is horrible. I’ve changed in more ways than one. As someone I work with always says “You’ve changed, you used to be cool”.

Here’s my new look, much more appropriate for test driving blue cocktails…

Elegant and stylish is my name

Top: Target, uh huh, suit style jacket

Bottom: Dragstar fully amazing new high waisted flares, still so high waisted I can’t actually do up the the top button

Accessory: I’m sticking with the Chanel handbag. It’s a winner

Day 352: Friday 16 April

April 16, 2010

Flaps fashions: Day 5

Check out my updated multi-media denim package

I must thank the awesome, talented, witty, charming and bolshie Vanessa Wagner for hosting her Unisex: Amateur Strip Night at the Oxford Hotel. Unfortunately last night was the final, which is very sad as it is a very funny adults only night, mid week too, meaning Oxford Street is a decent place to visit.

There’s a slight nudity warning on this video, nothing you wouldn’t see down at the beach, but a bit of boob action nonetheless. Extra massive thanks to Tx for his most excellent camera work too. So that’s my parental warning, here’s the vid!

The amazing suit in which I begin the ‘act’ comes from the Fashion House of Flaps. It is a spectacular example of high 1980s fashion: shoulder pads, pleated pants, narrow ankle, double breasted with a lace overprint to boot…

A tiny bit of watermelon flavoured lip gloss... that's why the lady is foxy

It’s also got an incredible lable…

Yes, this suit is GANGSTER!

I must point out the shoes too. They are denim, posted down by a very special lady in Brisbane…

There's nothing quite like a nice denim court shoe is there?

The only let down in the outfit, at this early stage, is my hair. I couldn’t decide which hideous old lady wig to wear so I wore none.

And I don’t think a revolting old ratted wig would have set off this particular item on which I spent days and days ‘studding’…

A big vat of of sizzling studded FAT!


nterim report… Check back later for a denim multi-media event


I have been grappling, wrestling, shouting at the dog to stop scratching (even though she is deaf and can’t hear a thing), yelling at my computer and generally raging against the (macbook) machine.

Why? I’ll tell you why! God-damn video!

As you all know (if you read this blog regularly) last night I stepped out of denim… literally. I stripped. I flashed. I wobbled. I grimaced and generally horrified a few people including myself once I viewed the video.

So this morning in an effort to move this blog into the realm of multi-media I thought I’ll just quickly edit that video and pop it up.

Harumph! Scream! Rage! Frustration!

But at last I succeeded.

Anyway, here’s what I’m wearing today…

I don't know whose wig I'm wearing this morning but I like it!

Top: That terrific Wrangler jacket I love so much. Thanks Flaps for letting me stink it up

Bottom: Levi’s flares with red stitching and nice crotch repairs

Accessory: Denim shoulder bag. It wasn’t in Flaps brief for this outfit, but I needed an accessory, and I needed a bag because I THOUGHT I’d be leaving the house early. Instead I have been sitting on the computer editing video for HOURS!

Sydney’s Mardi Gras

February 28, 2010

So yeah, like I went to the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras parade. And so yeah, like as usual I am too midgety to see much. But like, the crowd is as interesting as the parade. So I took a bunch of photos of some of the sights I saw, not much of it on the parade route.

The night started out a little strangely. We approached Taylor’s Square and this is the first sight we saw…

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Police

Police having a pow-wow before the parade

Yikes, is the crowd going to be half police?

So anyway we continued on our quest to get to the other side of South Dowling Street. This resulted in an hour long trek up South Dowling Street, up to the showground and back again finally on the other side of the parade route. Yes. One hour!

Back to the parade.

It turns out the guest of honour was NOT George Michael but Osama Bin Laden. I didn’t know he was gay, but he did have a large contingent of CIA minders with him…

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Osama Bin Laden

Osma Bin Laden wowing the crowd

Many folk in the crowd dressed both up and down for the big night. This winged fellow was a big hit and was continually photographed…

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Angel

Denim was also popular attire, with this group of girls all wearing a piece of denim…

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Denim

I did get permission to put their behinds on YoD

I suppose I should put some drag queen pics up, cos what’s a gay thing without drag queens? It’s nothing is what!

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Drag

Drag queens prefer blondes

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Drag

Proof that blondes DO have more fun

When we first go to the parade a police officer made us tip our beers out. Yep, he watched as we poured our beer into the gutter, but only 2 of us, not all of us. It was funny as we were surrounded by people drinking out of beer/wine/spirits. The fun police out in full force.

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras

PN in defiance of the police drinks TWO beers at once! Rebel

I then got obsessed with  a person standing in front of me in the crowd. It was the combination of glamour and back hair that was so intriguing…

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Drag glamour

Red wig: check, Feather boa: check, body glitter: check, back wax: fail

And the crowd ended up captivating me for most of the night…

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: crowd

Dynamic duo

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: crowd

Seems like a good time to walk the dogs, Man in background in his undies

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: crowd

Who could say no to this invitation?

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: underpants man

I asked him what happened to his clothes. He said "They fell off"

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: crowd

Viv waves her crazed ring and illegally drinks

Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras: Me

I pose and drink beer, police oblivious